Post op Journal

Oct 13th:
...and I'm home!!!  Surgery is all over with and now the rest is up to me.  I have to say that I was terrified right before they took me back.  Now that I think about it, when I got into the surgery room itself, it wasn't too bad and it went quicker (in my mind) than I expected.  So, surgery was an hour and 45 minutes with recovery room time at one hour.  Surgery was half hour late and I was finally in my room at 5 pm.  Not sure I remember all of that night, just remember nodding off quite a bit.  
First time I had to get up out of bed.....OUCH.  That hurt and I guess I wasn't expecting that pain.  10:30 that night was my first time getting out of bed.  I did so and was in quite a bit of pain, then I was very nauseated.  So, my next adventure out of bed was a bit easier.  Not as much pain, but more nausea.  I was on morphine so wasn't really feeling too much pain anyway.  Was told that when I get up in the morning that I will need to walk in the halls for the nurses to see.  Well, I was not about to walk in the halls with the nausea I was dealing with.  Without going into too much detail, they ended up taking me off the morphine and this helped almost immediately!  That is when the walking started! 
I am now on a liquid diet again, but this time I get sf pudding (life is good), creamed soups (need to be pureed and strained, but it's a different flavor that I havent had in a long time)!  They also gave me Luigi's italian ices in the hospital...I just looked them up online to find out where I can get them...they are just down the street!!!  So, all is well and stay tuned to see how the progression goes from here!
I have one word for you...RAMIKINS!!!! I put my soup in that and it's a perfect size! Just thought I would share.

Oct 14th:
Well...long day today.  Thought I was going to tough it out and not do meds until tonight....yeah...that lasted until about 11:30 today.  Finally found the mortar/pestal and then found the Luigi's italian ices!!!  It was a good day!  Still having some discomfort today and hopefully this will get easier.  Having some concerns about getting enough water in.  I know that Im not drinking enough and I need to drink more.  Could care less about eating right now...guess that will taper off.

Oct 16th:
Yesterday was a good day, had some visitors (thanks O and S), had roses delivered to the house..(Thanks M and T) and got out for a short time to the store.  When I read the other blogs in regards to "hell week"....they said that all you do is "rest, walk, rest, sip water and try to eat".  That is so true.  I can hardly wait till I can go back to the gym...I think I'll see this weight fall off of me even faster!  Hit 16 lbs down today!
Had a great idea today...take a whole bunch of chicken breasts cut them in half long ways and then bread them with the Panko bread crumbs and then cook them up.  Put them in individual packages and freeze them for easy fixing.  So, I guess the key word in that is "had".  I'm exhausted from just breading them, and putting them in the oven!  I haven't even put them in individual bags yet!  That's ok, they will be fine for both of us for meals later on.  In about two weeks I'll let you know how they are.

Oct 17th:
Feeling about the same today...possibly a little stronger.  I can't wait till I can drive again!  Went to the vitamin shoppe today and found a lot of options for me.  I'm gonna try some liquid calcium and see if that is easier to take than the crushed ones.  I'll let you know.  They did have liquid iron too so we will see.  Still needing pain medicine about 3 times in a 24 hr period.  I'm hoping that will taper off soon.

Oct 18th:
Feeling great this morning and think I may have done too much....feeling it for the rest of the day and this evening.  Took pain meds at about 11:30 and haven't been able to get a clear head since then.  Note to self...dont over do it!  Attempted butternut squash soup tonight!  It was a different flavor and it was something that did not have to be blended or strained.  Down 19.2 lbs today!

Oct 19th:
Still moving slow today, but feeling better.  Sat down at about 10:30 to read and woke up at 1:30.  Got two chapters in..ha ha.  Well, that tells me that my body still needs to rest.  So far no pain killers today, but I'm sure I'll be taking some before bed.

Oct 20th:
Did good yesterday!  Only took pain meds before bed, we'll see how I do today.  Planning on going back to the gym today!  I'll start off slow but I need to get back in the swing of things.  Down 22.8!!!!!

Went back to the gym...boy do I have a long way to go.  Was wiped just going up the stairs!!  Did 20 minutes on a low pace and now I'm feeling it.

I almost feel human again!!!  We went out to dinner tonight and I ordered a cup of soup!  I felt like I was back with the living.  Yes, it was just soup...but it was damn good!  Also, our bill was a lot smaller...ha ha.  No alcohol for me!

Oct 22nd:
Just got back from the gym and today was much better than Thursday.  I think I may have gone to the gym about 2 days too early.  I feel it right now..but not in a painful way, just discomfort.  Also...NO PAIN MEDS LAST NIGHT!!!  I did take a tylenol pm, but I dont consider those pain meds...they don't make you have horrific dreams!  Busy day planned and I'm looking forward to it, I'm sure I'll be whining about it tonight...ha ha.  Oh, and just in case you didn't see the weight loss tracker....24.6 down!!!!!

Oct 23rd:
Still beat from yesterday...but I'll live!  Went to the gym this morning and did well.  Feeling it a little now...but will take it easy for the rest of the day.  Weighed in this morning and am down 26 lbs!!!!  I love seeing that scale reduce daily.  I know this won't happen forever, but I'm enjoying it while it is.  Just baked brownies for Gary...it's funny...they smell wonderful, but I truly dont want any.  Even got some batter and caramel on my hands and washed them!!!  Didn't lick them at all!!!  I don't want to take any chances!
Just had a knock at our door, good friends and neighbors just brought over some soup for me and some homemade bread for Gary.  Thanks B for making the food and thanks to T for the delivery.

Oct 24th:
So I ventured out on my own today.  I went to the grocery store and bought items to have in my house at all times....kind of went thru and replenished my pantry.  Then went out and found a few cookbooks that are clearly for weight loss surgery patients.  I didn't find the books at the store but came home and bought them online. 
Follow-up dr visit tomorrow...should be interesting.  I am so hoping he will say that I can go to soft foods now....let's keep our fingers crossed!  Researched a lot of recipes yesterday and am excited to try them.  So many of them are high in protein!  I have the link on my blog "This one is my Favorite", go to recipes and start looking...they are great recipes.

Oct 25th:
Had my two week check up today and it went great!!!  They have me at 31.2 lbs down and our scales are the same so I'm now going with their numbers!!!!  Soft foods starting on Friday!!  Do that for 3 weeks and so the week before Thanksgiving I will be on solid foods!  Dr said I am on track and doing well...so things are good.  I wanted to be at about 35 lbs down when I went back to work and it looks like I just might make it.

Oct 26th:
Been driving around today running errands and feeling great.  Had a moment of fear and I think I need to share that.  Maybe someone who is reading this and is going through what I am might understand this...As I was reveling in my 32.2 lb loss today I realized that I can't see the "big picture".  I have lost this much and more on diets and have ALWAYS failed.  I guess I'm just scared that history will repeat itself and I'll be right back where I was.  'Deep breath'....ok...now that I got that out of my system...thanks for listening (reading).

Oct 27th:
Ok, so I couldnt wait one more day and I went to soft foods today...shhhh, don't tell the dr.  So, first soft food today was egg salad...it kind of set a little heavy but wan't too bad.  For dinner we had chicken and baked potato.  Now, when I say we had...I had about less than a quarter of a baked potato and half of a piece of chicken the size of the palm of my hand.  The dinner wasn't as heavy feeling as the egg salad but that was my first real food in 27 days.  Since I am eating so slowly...my chicken got cold and I now need to figure out a way to keep it moist...I'll work on that.  The hardest part about that is that you can't drink anything while you're eating....so dry food is even harder to eat.  Maybe make some fat free gravy for those chicken nights.

Oct 28th:
So today has been a good day of experimenting with food.  Had the egg cups this morning and that was good, then had the ricotta cheese, splenda and mashed berries...very tasty.  That will be an easy one to take to work.  Having fish and acorn squash for dinner tonight...should be good.  Everything that I've eaten has set well with me and I haven't had any problems yet.

Oct 29th:
Big obstacle to overcome tonight.  We have a party to attend with a lot of alcohol and food flowing.  I will be drinking water and eating very very little.  I'll let you know how I did.  I did make popcorn for the event and now my house smells like popcorn...oh how I miss popcorn...oh well, someday.  Another concern that I'm having today is that I've been lightheaded today and yesterday.  Talked with T who has anemic concerns, and this sounds like I may be low on iron.  So I started some iron supplements today...hopefully that will help.  Food today has been great...not overeating or uncomfortable at all.

side note: Just fit into a pair of capri jeans that I haven't worn in over a year!  They are even comfortable!

Oct 30th:
Last night was not bad at all!  I drank water the whole night and had a few nibbles of the food.  I did not feel like I missed out at all...so I guess you can have fun without alcohol!!!  Just teasing.  My popcorn was a big hit and I think I missed that a little bit.  Hit the gym this morning and have been wiped out all day.  Not sure if it's just a mental thing since I am going back to work tomorrow....ish.  I have a feeling I will be out cold tomorrow evening by 7 pm!  I think the trick to going back to work is being prepared...making sure I have all food ready for breakfast, lunch and all supplements...I'll let you know how I do!

Oct 31st:
Well, it's 5:15 am and I'm already for work...almost sounds like the first day of school, being up so early and ready.  I'm very prepared right now (food wise) for work and should be fine.  Thrilled...no, beyond thrilled that I hit 35 lbs today!!  This was a personal goal of mine and reaching it feels good.  I'll check back with you later and let you know how I survived the first day back!

Ok, so I survived the first day back!  I'm beat and only worked a 9 hour shift...as opposed to a 10 hour shift...(I have a desk job..it's not physically strenuous, just mentally challenging).  All in all it wasn't too bad.

Nov 1st:
Had my last class tonight and my first support group.  The support group was very helpful and I believe I will go back next month.  It was good to hear from people that are in different stages of this process.  There were two women there that had not had surgery yet, I wish I would have gone to one of these before surgery.  I suggest that any one who is reading this and considering surgery...please go to a support group...it will help you...I promise.

Nov 2nd:
So, I had my first experience today with food gettng stuck.  I have one word for you....OUCH.  This was about an hour and a half battle and I can honestly say, I don't ever want to go through that again.  So, note to self....chew my food better.  All the walking couldn't make it better....and jumping wasn't going to work either (that was for you O).  So I had to get sick to get rid of the food that was stuck.  After that fun experience, I felt %100 better!  Now let's just hope I can learn from my mistakes.

Nov 6th:
Ok, so I've missed a few days on the blog...sorry.  Been at the gym on Thursday evening, yesterday and today.  Tried a few different things instead of the treadmill.  Thursday I swam 30 laps...I am a really slow swimmer (no wonder I couldnt cut it on the swim team in high school...divers only had to swim from the deep end to the side,hence...I was a diver).  On Saturday I tried the water aerobics....that was interesting, not sure I'll do that one again.  I could feel the difference in my muscles, but not much of a cardiac workout.  Went back to the treadmill today and did so much better. 
So, remember how I said I just need to learn from my mistakes?  Apparently I don't do that very well.  I had another episode of food getting stuck yesterday morning.  I'm learning to just get rid of it and not endure the pain and discomfort...now all I need to learn is chewing my food better and I won't have to endure the pain and discomfort or even getting rid of it.

Nov 9th:
Wow....am I discouraged right now.  I know that people are going to say to me "it takes time, don't be frustrated".  Well, I am a woman and I want everything done YESTERDAY!  This pound a week right now is not flying too well with me.  I'm eating about 400 calories a day, anyone would lose weight on that....except me!  Ok...well enough of the pity party right now...I guess I feel a bit better after getting that off of my chest...thanks.

Nov 11th:
Today is my one month post op anniversary...happy anniversary to me!
I'm still battling with learning how to eat now.  In a 7 day span, I've been sick about 5 times.  Those aren't the best odds and I have to find a way to stop this.  At this rate, I should have just not had the surgery and started to binge and purge!  This way I could have eaten a lot more...just joking, another sign of my sick humor. 
Went to Trader Joe's today and found several things that I can eat.  I do want to tell you that I miss pasta.  Now having said that, I'm finding that the things that use to taste great...don't.  Since pasta is really something of a forbiden food right now I guess that's why I miss it the most.  I found gnocchi's though at Trader Joe's and I think this might be my answer to pasta.  They are small potatoes in a sauce that taste and have the consistency of pasta.  They arent too bad for the portion size that I have...76 calories, 2.3 gr protein and 3.6gr fat.  I'll let you know if they satisfy the pasta craving.  Also bought some swordfish and scallops...love seafood.  If you didn't see the weight loss chart...I LOST MORE WEIGHT!  I'm now down to 37.6 and thrilled about it.  I need to work on drinking more water, this will help jump start the weight loss even more.  I still have a goal of 50 lbs at Thanksgiving...let's keep our fingers crossed!

Nov 12th:
So far haven't been sick today...that's a good day!  Went to a birthday party for our 4 yr old grandson today.  Chips, dips, raw veggies and hot dogs...I ate cottage cheese before the party and didn't have anything but water at the party.  Good news, was able to wear jean capri's that I haven't worn in about 2 years and they were comfortable.  It might be time soon to go through my closet and get rid of clothes that are too big.

Nov 15th:
I've gone three days now without getting sick...could it be that I've actually learned something?  Time will tell.  If you haven't seen my weight loss chart, I hit 40 lbs today!!!!  Life is good.
Wow, did I jinx myself today....got sick again.  Guess I won't brag about not getting sick anymore!

Nov 17th:
Lost a pound and a half in one day!  Right now at this rate I could hit my goal of 50 lbs by Thanksgiving.  I would be happy being within 5 lbs of that goal by then if I can't make it all the way.  Am allowed to eat regular foods starting today.  Funny how I just made my breakfast and lunch for today and it's the regular soft foods that I've been eating (Ricotta with raspberries and cottage cheese).  I guess I'm a bit nervous to try anything to quickly.

Nov 18th:
Now that I am on regular food and making my own food choices, I feel like I'm in control now.  Took our grandson (K) to the movies tonight.  Had about 4 pieces of popcorn.  I think it smelled better than it tasted.  Then we went to dinner afterwards...Mexican food....I had about 4 chips and about 4 bites of a tostada.  I was full and actually had a chip in my hand and put it down and was finished.  Some of you might think that is really trivial....it isn't.  I think it's huge to know that I had what I wanted but wasn't overwhelmed with choices or decisions.  Oh, hit 43.6 lbs down!!

Nov 19th:
Went to the gym this morning and swam laps...good work out.  We went to the store afterwards and I hit a wall.  Ate probably 3 bites of breakfast prior to the gym, apparently that wasn't enough!  I spent the rest of the day trying to regain energy.  Breakfast is something that I've had before and yet it didn't set well this time at all.  At the support group, they talked about Muscle Milk.  Now...for all of you who don't know me, I HATE MILK.  So we bought one and Gary said he would drink it if I didn't.  It was a banana creme flavor.  I hate to admit it, but it was pretty good.  I can see that it could be a good source of protein supplement for me.  It is a bit high in calories so a half of one wouldnt be too bad.

Nov 22nd:
I know, it's been a few days.  I know that I named this blog "roller coaster journey".  I truly thought that was depicting the emotions that I endured during the presurgery stage.  I had no idea that would include my post surgery emotions as well.  Frustrated that I'm getting sick about every other day now...sometimes twice in one day...and not losing a whole lot!  And yet, last week was losing weight at rapid speed.  I know all the cliche's and the plataeu theory's...it still doesnt help.  In two days is Thanksgiving.  I'm making a small dinner for Gary and I, so not too worried about that.  Having a big dinner at family's house with all family around...that should be interesting...alcohol involved, lots of food and desserts.  Stay tuned...I'll let you know how that all pans out!

Nov 27th:
Well, I survived the Thanksgiving holiday!  It was easy at times and then there were other times I had some difficulties.  All in all, I made it through.  Haven't been feeling too well lately...sure hope that passes.

Nov 30th:
Finally....I hit 50 lbs! 50.8 to be exact!  Been a rough week emotionally and physically....let's hope it gets better from here!

Dec 2nd:
As I said in the post above "been a rough week".  I've been fighting with myself as to indulge this information or not.  Apparently I'm going to...ha ha.  I've contracted a mrsa infection.  Now, I did not read this in the "gastric bypass brochure".  I also felt like I did a lot of research prior to my decision and my surgery and was not aware of this possibility.  So, this is why I felt the necessity to divulge this information.  If you are considering this surgery then you should have all info available.  I won't give you the horrible details of mrsa, google it.  It's not pretty. 
I will however tell you what I'm dealing with now.  I'm on extremely strong antibiotics which you have to have on a full stomach.  I have NO desire to eat at this point and am tired of dry heaves...this is a daily occurance.  I'm losing weight pretty fast and that concerns me.  I have a dr's apt next Wed but will call them on Monday morning to discuss these concerns.  I have to soak in a 1/3 cup bleach and 13 gal water for 20 minutes daily.  I have to clorox bleach the shower after I get out and wipe down all bathroom fixtures with clorox wipes after I've touched them while changing my bandages.  As long as my infections are covered, then I am not contagious to others around me. 
My immune system was low due to the surgery and the difference in eating.  That is why I contracted it.  I can't be sure where I contracted it from, but I'm guessing the gym swimming pool.  I will always be a carrier of mrsa.  This is not good news to me.

Dec 3rd:
I may have found an answer.  I took my antibiotics with Muscle Milk last night.  I crushed the horse pill up until it was a fine consistency and then put it in a shot glass with the Muscle Milk.  It did make the taste of the milk disgusting but it coated my stomach (pouch) and seemed to reduce the naseau completely.  I'll let you know how the rest of the day goes!

Dec 4th:
Well, the Muscle Milk worked for a little bit.  Each day the naseau is getting worse.  I'm more concerned about the rapid weight loss.  Have a call into the dr and will hear from him soon.  Dr just called and told me to stop taking the Doxycycline Hyclate.  Said that this is a very rough med for your stomach.  I can only hope it helps at this point.
I am feeling a little better, about how I felt a few days ago so I guess that means the antibiotic is leaving my system....I hope so.  Going to try and work tomorrow...not sure for how long though.  We'll see.

Dec 5th:
Well, didnt make it into work.  This sucks.

Dec 6th:
Didnt make it to work again today.  I'm hoping for tomorrow but will have to leave for dr apt....we'll see.

Dec 7th:
Normally I would be upset that I just gained a pound and a half!  Apparently these aren't normal times and I'm thrilled.  This means that I'm getting better.  So far so good for going to work today...about to jump in the shower and see if I can make it.  I'll let you know...

Dec 8th:
Made it to work today and stayed the whole day...what a concept!  I feel about 200 times better than I did this last weekend.  This was a rough two weeks, but I'm ready to get back up and brush myself off and get back to eating well and feeling good.  Went out to dinner tonight and I think it was the first time I felt normal again.  I don't mean "normal" in a bad way...I wasn't worried about what I was going to eat or if I could keep it down.  It just felt good to order and know that it was a good/healthy choice.  I ate more than I have been too...not to the point of feeling so full that I'm sick or anything....just ate "normal".

Dec 11th:
Today is my 2 month post op anniversary.  I'm currently at a plateau with my weight loss right now...I'm not upset about it, I know it will kick back in here soon.

Dec 16th:
It's been almost a week since I've posted anything on the journal.  I'm still in quite a plateau and not real happy about that.  Doubt that I will hit my goal of 70 lbs by Christmas and I'm ok with that...but would like to be on my way down, not up!  Well...time will tell I suppose.

Dec 19th:
Ok, I don't want to get too excited or anything...but I did see a slight reduction on the scale!  Could this plateau be done?  Let's hope so.  Done with the antibiotics now and still no food tastes good, or has any taste for that matter.  Having Christmas Eve at our house this year...that's a good thing because I will be busy with company and all and won't have to worry about eating while everyone is here.  I can just take a bite here and there and be fine with that.

Dec 21st:
Still seeing the scale reduce (although not today...but I think it will keep going down).  Ha ha...doubt  I'll hit my 70 lb goal in 4 days.  That's ok, it will get here.

Dec 24th:
Happy Christmas Eve!  Been very busy with gettng the house ready, food ready, etc.  Going to the gym this morning and then going to see about a new outfit for the party tonight.  Stepping out of the box with this outfit..so making C go with me to tell me the truth on how it looks!  Lost a little more today...down to 59.4!  Call me crazy...but Im pretty sure I won't be hitting my 70 lb goal for Christmas day.  Hitting 60 tomorrow will be good enough.  Oh yes....Im planning on having a drink tonight.  It will be a very light drink, but a drink just the same.  I miss having a drink.  Now, I don't belong at AA or anything like that...but I  haven't had anything to drink since mid September.
Everyone just left and I think it was very successful.

Dec 31st:
Been a week since I've posted anything on here.  Been frustrated with the lack of movement on the scale.  It's been going down ever so slightly but not fast enough.  I'm going to try and kickstart this thing back into a forward motion and go back to the soft food phase and soups.  This should help....I hope.

Jan 2nd:
The new year is upon us and I am determined to make it a memorable one by being a hell of a lot smaller by fall!  Went to neighbors for the new year and had a great time. (thank you T and B).  I actually had 3 drinks through the entire night and still managed to lose weight.  I ate a little bit before we went there just in case nothing tasted good or set well and I didnt have to feel like I HAD to eat something there.  I did eat a little bit there but not much.  I saw the scale move down a little bit more today...took me 4 times this morning to weigh before it did...but I'll take whatever I can!

Jan 5th:
Down to 64.2 this morning!  Funny how it's a good day when the scale is down...Feeling better each day now!  Salad is tasting good these days and I hope that stays.  Went to support group on Tuesday night.  It was good, but it was the same conversations and people talking as the first time I went.  Not sure how I feel about that...may go once more and see if it changes.  I did find out that I'm not the only person getting sick, taste buds have changed completely and have an aversion to meat!

Jan 13th:
I know, I know...it's been awhile.  Finally hit 70 lbs today!!!  Now I need to set my sights on 80!  My goal for 80 is to make it there by January 28th.  This is a very important date in my life and quite significant in my weight loss adventure.  Remember...I'm still working on getting to 100 lbs by my birthday!  We will see...

Jan 14th:
Was just reviewing my blog this morning and noticed in the "stats" section that I've had 1304 hits to my blog!  I think that's a lot and thank everyone who has been in here to share the roller coaster adventure with me.  Scale is still moving down...ever so slightly...but down just the same!  Leaving for the gym shortly and then going to the "home show" today for a lot of walking...this can only help the scale reduction!  Fixed spaghetti last night for dinner.  Had a turkey meatball, 1/2 cup of spaghetti and very small piece of bread....had to get rid of it.  I've had this before and it was fine...it's like a crap shoot!  One day something sets fine and the next that same thing doesn't set well at all, frustrating....

Jan 18th:
Been doing ok...caught a cold and I'm dealing with that.  Stayed home from work on Monday to kick this cold and that seems like it may have worked.  I still have a little of it, but not like I did for the last few days.  Scale is at 72 lbs and I'm hoping for 80 on the 28th.  Don't worry...I won't want to jump off a bridge or anything if I don't...but a girl can dream!  Had a few people tell me today that I was looking good and they can really tell how much weight I've lost...nice feeling.  Even had someone tell me that they thought I was in a smaller size than I am...that too was a good feeling.

Jan 22nd:
We had filet mignon tonight.  First attempt at red meat since surgery.  I was able to eat about 8 bites the size of my pinky fingernail.  It tasted great...had white asparagus on the grill and sauteed some onions and mushrooms.  Very good dinner...but won't be able to do that too much.  Scale hasn't moved a whole lot lately...if only...if only I could get to 80 by Saturday...well, a girl can always dream!

Jan 27th:
So...unless I lose 7.2 pounds in one day I will not hit my goal for tomorrow....ha ha.  I laugh because I don't want anyone to think I'm standing on top of a building ready to jump...I'm fine.  These are small goals that I have to have to keep focused on the big picture.  Cleaned out my closet a few weeks ago.  I have 6 garbage bags full of clothes that no longer fit me.  I found out a few things when I did this....
1. I have way too many clothes because my closet doesnt even look like I did anything to it!
2. I have a shopping problem since some of the clothes I got rid of still had the tags on them!

Jan 28th:
Well, I didn't make my goal of 80 lbs today....74 is still good.  Bought a pair of work pants yesterday....4 sizes smaller than I was in on October 1st!

Jan 29th:
So I thought I would share something that happened ealier this week.  This may not be much to some people, especially ones that haven't fought with their weight as I have.  I was at work and crossed my legs above the knee...and it was comfortable!!  Now, as I said...some may not find this as a milestone...this is huge to me!  This was one of those personal goals that I wanted to achieve.  Took some clothes to M to be altered yesterday.  I can get rid of a lot of clothes (and have) but if they can be altered for me to wear them longer then I'm going to try.  Thank goodness I have the opportunity for that with M...thank you M for doing this for me.

Feb 2nd:
I finally hit 75 lbs!!!!  That last 5 seemed to take forever.  Talked to a personal trainer at the gym and will shake things up a bit with my workout and see if that can jump start some more weight loss.  Not looking forward to "planks"...I hate that excersize.

Feb 5th:
Super Bowl Sunday...hmmmmm.  Going to have a few people over and of course snacking is going to happen.  Did the new workout yesterday and I could tell a big difference.  I was wiped out!  It was good though.  I'll do it again today...and I have been doing the dreadfull "planks"....ish.  Hoping to see inches melting away.  Speaking of inches, I don't think I've posted how many inches that I've lost so far...so here it goes

Arms lost 5.5 inches
Waist lost 10.75 inches
Hips lost 6 inches
Legs lost 2.5 inches
Chest (sad face) lost 7 inches
Neck lost 2 inches

Feb 10th:
So, Im not sure what it is about Fridays but it seems that I am dropping the pounds on Fridays and Saturdays.  The rest of the week I seem to be all over the board and then it goes down on Fridays and Saturdays.  Not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing...I guess just a curious thing for me.  I'm at 78.8 today and I've only weighed twice so it could be lower...fingers crossed.  Been a bit depressed about the "all over the board" for the week, it's so frustrating.  I have lost more weight now than I ever have in any of my weightloss adventures, so you would think that I would be thrilled.  I am thrilled, but as I've said before, I'm a woman...which means, I want more and I want it yesterday!!!!

Feb 11th:
Today is my 4 month post op anniversary and I hit 80.2!!!  They say that you should be seeing hair loss at the 4 month point....haven't seen any yet.  Of course, I'm looking for it more than ever and I thought I was seeing some a few weeks ago, but I really think it was just normal shedding. (wow, that makes me sound like a collie or something). I weighed in again and it was even less...so, Im taking the least amount and I've lost 81 lbs as of today!!!!

Feb 19th:
So I found a website blog on WEBMD of gastric bypass and lapband patients who have gained most or all of their weight back!  I have to tell you, this scares the crap out of me.  This sight had about 140 posts and I read every single one of them.  Some admitted to going back to thier old habits and some didnt.  Some admitted to no excersize and some didnt.  I know that the surgery is just a means to an end and is not the end all be all.  I guess as long as I keep this in mind, I can overcome this common downfall.  Getting ready to go on a long weekend with Gary to San Francisco!  This is the happiest place on earth in my world.  I love this city.  We will not be renting a car....walking up and down will be our excersize for 4 days. Hopefully will lose some more weight next weekend.  I won't have access to a scale and that will make me crazy....remember...Im a scale whore!

Feb 27th:
Arrived home yesterday evening from our long weekend in Frisco.  It was a wonderful time and beautiful weather.  We WALKED EVERYWHERE!!!!  Most of the walking was uphill/downhill.  The flattest terrain was the Golden Gate Bridge walk.  Now...here is the kicker...I lost ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!!!!  Can I tell you how frustrating that is when you are climbing stairs to Coit Tower (we were staying very close to Coit Tower and we climbed stairs to get to our place several times a day!!!) and you don't lose any weight at all?  I did have an alcoholic drink daily...just one a day.  I'm hanging on to the fact that this could be a plateau and that I will jump down quickly next week.  Ok, enough whining about it.  When we went to Frisco a few years back we walked all over too.  It was a whole lot easier this time around. 
Now a little humor.  While getting my drivers license out for the flights I noticed that I am 3 lbs away from my weight on my license finally telling the truth!  Guess it's time to go get another license and lie about my age even more! One more thing...and this isn't big for some people...but for me it was great.  The airplane seats were comfortable and that hasn't happened in a long time.

March 2nd:
I'm quickly approaching my 5 month post op.  My biggest concern at this time is hair loss.  They say that you should see some hair loss around the 4th and 5th month post op.  As of now...I really haven't seen any type of hair loss at all.  I will say that my nails are not growing like they use to and I don't see any new hair growth from the shampoo I'm using.  I'm very relieved that the hair loss if any may be minimal.

March 10th:
I know it's been over a week since I've posted on here.  Not a lot has changed lately.  Had my follow up dr apt yesterday and it went fine.  He said I am on track with the weight loss.  I'm deficient in Vitamin D and Vitamin A so this means I'm now on more supplements. He did say that all of my other numbers were great.
Going to a party tonight with some very good friends and their families.  Haven't seen most of these people in over 10 years.  Not sure how I'm going to handle the food/drinking tonight.  Maybe eat something before we go to make sure the alcohol doesn't effect me too much. Tomorrow we will be meeting friends at the horse track.  I am very excited about this because a few haven't seen me since 30+ lbs ago and the others haven't seen me since about 6 months prior to sugery.

March 11th:
5 months ago today was my surgery.  I just hit 88.2!  At least the scale moved in the right direction and I'm good with that. Did very well at the party last night.  Horse track today with good friends.

March 16th:
Ok, so I know I haven't posted my weight for a week.  I've been a bit depressed that I hit 88 lbs lost and then jumped right back up to 85, 86 etc.  This was truly depressing me and I am so afraid that I won't lose anymore than what I have right now.  Having said all that, I just went to the store and bought some more clothes (I do have a shopping problem) in the next size down!  I haven't been in this size for over 25 years!  I am still depressed about my weight loss right now because I have been in the mid to high 80's for a month...this is way too long.  It seems my body doesn't want go into that 90 range.  Maybe I'm losing inches and reporportioning (not sure if that is even a word) my weight in other areas.

March 22nd:
I don't want to jinx this or anything...but I did break out of the 88 lb dungeon I was in!  Granted...just by a few ounces...but hey...who's counting???  Oh wait...I am!  Let's hope this kicks in a jump in weight loss again.

March 25th:
Phew!!!!  That took  a long long time to get out of the 80's! 6 weeks to be exact!!!  That is way too long.  Let's hope my body was just comfortable in that range and it will move a little faster now.  I did have a small goal of hitting 100 by Easter...but I doubt that will happen.  I'll take whatever I can get at this point.  Think I'll check out inches lost today...if it's good news , I'll let you know. I first weighed this morning and it was 90.4, but we went to the gym and I weighed when we got home (weighing several times a day is the norm for me) and I hit 91!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I thrilled....and so the rollercoaster is at the highest point right now...ha ha

March 30th:
A few things have happened in the last few days that I thought I would share.  First, people who don't know that I've had surgery are making comments on how I look!  It feels good.  Someone that I use to work with in my department is in another department and took the time to send me an email to tell me how good I look.  Then last night a waitress at our neighborhood bar made a wonderful comment on how I look.  This was a good feeling.
Now, this morning I saw some pictures of myself from last April and last August...omg....I looked hideous.  What a difference it is now.  I have a shape again!  This is so exciting and so fun to shop and try on clothes!  I do know that I am a woman without a department!....ha ha.  I'm a bit lost when shopping and it takes me a bit longer as now I'm in just about every department in the store.  This gives me a lot more choices...this is good and bad!  I'm sure I'll be back to one or two departments pretty soon.

April 8th:
Happy Easter everyone!  Good news/Bad news today....I was hoping to be at 100 by today, but that didn't happen. (That was the bad news)...I did hit 93.6 today and that is the GOOD news!  I have decided that when I do hit 100 I will buy me a special present...I have my eyes on a darling pair of shoes at Brighton!  Not sure if I've shared this with you or not...but I am a self proclaimed "Brighton Whore"....love their shoes, purses, sun glasses, etc.  These shoes are a bit pricey and something I would have to really think about before buying them...well at least think about it on the drive to the store!  Coming up on my 6 month post op!

April 11th:
Happy 6th month Anniversary to me!!!!  I can honestly say now...wait for it....wait for it....I'm happy I had the surgery!!!  Yes, I said it!  It's taken me this long to come to terms with my new lifestyle and now I have embraced it.  I know that the weight will still go down and will plateau at times and I'm ok with that too.  I am hoping that 100 is soon....let's all keep our fingers crossed...those Brighton shoes aren't going to wait forever you know!!  Ha ha

April 14th:
I can almost feel those shoes on my feet!

April 15th:
I don't know what happened to my body this week...but I'm not complaining.  I've lost 5 lbs in a week!  Maybe the weight loss has kicked into second gear and I am on my way down again for a little while...I sure hope so.  All I know is that as soon as my head caught up with my body...I started to lose weight quickly again....I love it!

April 20th:
Well....I've stopped for a bit again...got to love this weight loss roller coaster!  I couldn't take it anymore and I bought my shoes!  I won't wear them until I hit the 100 mark though....I've almost worn them and thought about lying that I hit 100 but decided I couldn't pull off the fake excitement!  I'll get there, I know it.  I did talk to a friend today about strength training with the cardio.   I guess that will now be added to my routine here at home.  I like doing the cardio at the gym and can do the strength here.  I'll let you know how that progresses. B saw me this week for the first time since late November and was very surprised at how much I've changed...that felt good.

April 29th:
I am wearing my shoes as of today!!!!  That was a long two weeks and I can't believe my reaction when I hit 100.  For those of you that know me well....you won't be surprised.  I was very surprised though....I wept.  I knew I would hit it, I knew it was only a matter of time and yet, I still was overcome with emotion of getting there.  Still...writing this is making me a bit misty too!  Well....on to the next ten!!!

May 5th:
Happy Cinco de Mayo!  I know that my last post said that I was "on to the next ten"...but it seems that my body doesnt want to stay at this 100! I'm hoping it will start to like it soon!

May 11th:
Today is my 7 month post op anniversary and I just hit 105.4!!!  At this rate, I should be at my weight range on my one year anniversary.  I'm going to a new support group tonight closer to my house.  I'll let you know how it goes.

May 12th:
So my first night of the new support group and it was cancelled!  Not a good start.  Then I find out that it was suppose to be a "pot luck night".  Does anyone else find this ironic?  Seriously??  Pot Luck Night for a bunch of people that can't eat more than a cup of food at a meal?  I guess the good way to look at it is...you don't have to bring much!  That wasn't enough...I then found out that another support group meets near me and that takes place at a funeral home....again...irony anybody?  I would love some comments on this new information...I can use some humor, I can always use some humor!

May 27th:
I hit 111.4 this morning!!!!  This is so exciting to me at this time because it almost feels like I'm not even trying.  This tells me that this way of life has become natural to me now.  I dont miss anything as far as eating goes.  If I want to have something, I have it...just in moderation.  We even went out for yogurt last night and I didn't choose sugar free.  I ate about 1/2 and put it in the freezer for another time.  I still had what I wanted and now I have more to eat later! 

June 8th:
Miss me?  I've been a bit preoccupied by a few other things and haven't had a moment to talk with you all until now.  Have been hanging on the 111 range for about 3 weeks now...ish.  That's ok...I think it's going to kick in again starting today!  Im now at 111.6 and I think that will drop even more today. Just two posts ago I told you about the new support group...well we should have it tonight....stay tuned!

Went to the support group...This was a much smaller group and we were in a lunch room (anybody see the irony here?)  Quite a diverse group and conversation was mostly divided by all...which was good.  What I do like about it and will go back because of it...the therapist has had Gastric Bypass too, just two years ago.  She was great and very responsive and understanding to all. I won't be able to go back in the next few months as I have prior commitments.  I'll go back in September...again, stay tuned.

June 11th:
Happy 8 month anniversary to me!  Seems like I'm on a bit of a plateau....I've been there before and I'm sure I'll be there again so I need to just relax.

June 17th:
Still on a plateau right now...not happy about it.  Tried to mix up the workout a bit and that hasnt helped either...frustrating!  So far all the weight has come off pretty easily...I want that to still be the case for the last 50 pounds.

June 22nd:
The scale moved!!!!!  Woo Hoo!!!!  I hit 115 today and hopefully the scale will move some more before my next plateau.  I have to say that Im a bit worried right now about losing all the weight I need to lose.  When I come across plateaus, it makes me think that I'm done!  That I can't lose anymore.  Remember...I'm a woman...therefore I want it yesterday!!  So these non weightloss spans are not really in my plans!!!!  I've also been thinking about pictures....I think I'm ready to put a pic out in the world of the internet!!!  When I think I look my best, go in and take a picture when I look at said picture....IT IS NOT WHAT I SAW IN THE MIRROR!!!!  What is that about?  I figure since I've lost so much weight I can truly see myself in the mirror!  Well, apparently not!  So...my plan today is to take lots of pics of me until I find one I like...ha ha...so don't hold your breath on seeing a pic of me too soon!!!   ha ha ha

July 7th:
So I finally found a picture to put out on the internet that I liked.  That was such a huge step for me but it was received well by friends and family so that made it easier.  When I logged into this blog today I noticed that I have only 9 views before I hit 2,000 views on my blog!!!!  Thanks to everyone who is reading this.  I think this has been very theraputic for me and I hope it helps someone make a decision if this type of adventure is for them!  Coming up on my 9 month anniversary!

July 8th:
One more view on this blog and it will be 2,000 views!!!!  So...if you view after 10:42 am today...then you are the 2,000 viewer!  Don't really have a prize for you are anything...just the knowledge that you are #2k!

July 9th:
Wow...I'm now at 2013!!! Thanks for following everyone!  Had something happen today that I found encouraging.  We had a morale day at work...this consisted of us going to Laser Quest and play a few games of laser tag.  I am the most competetive person I know...and so you can imagine how much I like laser tag!  The last time we had played laser tag was about 8 years ago...and I was NOT IN SHAPE.  If you havent played it before...it's quite exhausting.  Well...when we did it today...I handled it wonderfully....thank you gym!  It was a good feeling.

July 13th:
The scale moved this morning again...whew...I was starting to think this was it...granted, it didnt move much...but it moved!  I'm at 118.6 lbs lost as of this morning.  We are going to Cirque Du Soleil tonight...I can hardly wait!  Unfortunately I'm missing my support group tonight...but still connected to them on fb.

July 19th:
I hit 120!!!!!!  It seemed to take forever!  That's ok, I hit it and now on to the 130's!  I kept thinking that it's been two and a half months in the one teens...but I just looked back at it and it hasn't been a full two months...so maybe the weight loss isnt moving as slow as I was thinking.  Still, as I've said before...I'm a woman and want it YESTERDAY!!  Had a bit of a milestone yesterday.  I was at work and had to deliver some paperwork to the fourth floor of our building.  I am located on the first floor.  As I was walking to the elevators, I decided to forgo those and take the stairs.  I didn't get winded (and it was just a little bit) until hitting the 3rd floor and when I got to the fourth floor, I was able to talk to the person I was giving the paperwork to right away.  Big change!  I was so proud of myself that I took the stairs back down too.  I saw more of a difference going down because my knees didnt hurt like they use to when descending stairs!

July 29th:
Well, I've been a bit distracted these days as I've connected up with people that are going thru this journey.  It's been good to get in touch with them and I appreciate everyones help, advice and experiences.  These are the things that Im realizing...I am ONE LUCKY GAL!  Many have lost large amounts of hair, many are limited to a very simple diet.  I have had none of these problems.  I was so concerned about the hair loss and I had none.  I still have some issues with marinara sauce, but that is really just about the only healthy food I need to stay away from. 

As I said, Ive been talking to alot of people in my shoes and I found that there is something called NSV (Non-Scale-Victory).  I actually believe most of these postings are just that!  Now that I know what it is and what it stands for....I will use it from now on.

NSV: I have been doing the treadmill at the gym for almost a year now.  I had my personal best this morning-2 miles @ 29:03!!!!  This was average speed at 4.1!  I jogged a little bit of it and walked at a fast pace for the rest.  It was a good workout and now gonna work on getting it under 29.00!  On July 9th I said that I am a very competetive person...especially when it is with myself!  I always want to outdo myself and I think this has helped me at the gym.

Aug 3rd:
Good morning everyone!  I'm pretty excited here with my weightloss today!  123.8 lbs gone!  I guess my "dumping experience" last night was worth it?  Not really...I need to remember that poor choices result in dumping and that is NO FUN AT ALL!  For those who don't know...dumping syndrome is what your body goes thru when you have eaten something fried or something with high sugar.  Your body is rushing water to the food item in your small intestines and the results are not fun.  Sweating, cramping, nasea....lot's of fun stuff.  This lasted for almost an hour...just long enough to rethink your choices and hopefully remember them in the future!

Aug 6th:
I saw this last week in my support groups facebook page and it made me cry.  Thought I would share this and share my feelings on it.  We are harder on ourselves than anyone could ever even think of being towards us and yet we feel that since we are so hard on ourselves that everyone else feels this way towards us as well.  I thought I was put this out there so you can understand how hard I have always been on myself...usually hiding it with humor...

Hey, Fat Girl.

Yes, you. The one feigning to not see me when we cross paths on the running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy. You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make you cringe.

You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.

You are awesome.

If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.

You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is possible.

You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people, know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health, “starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.

You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.

I bow to you.

Thanks for letting me share this...

Aug 24th:
Miss me?  I haven't been too keen on coming on here and telling you how slow my weight loss has been going.  It's been so slow...(How slow is it?)...it's been so slow that it wasnt even moving!  Very depressing for me.  Well...the scale moved ever so slightly this morning and I finally hit 125 lbs lost.  We have lost our membership at the gym.  I guess it was good while it lasted.  For one year my employer was covering the cost for my hubby and I to go to the gym.  This was great.  Well...they have changed their minds and are taking it away.  So...after Sept 30th, we will start doing a lot of hiking and I am now on the lookout for a good treadmill for home.  I think I can stay motivated enough for that!  I am now wearing some large sizes!  Mostly in the xlarge right now but those are starting to get big on me. 

Here's a bit of good news...went on a girl trip with Mom and Sisters a few weeks ago.  Wait for it....wait for it...I DIDNT FALL!!!!  Our past few girl trips always included a fall from me.  Sometimes in private (hiking in the Rocky Mtns) and sometimes in public (Street Fair in San Diego).  We hiked this time and I kept up just fine.  We walked and I kept up and sometmes passed them by.  It was a good feeling to know that I am now in shape!

Sept 1st:
Happy Labor Day to all!  Scale has been moving a little bit this last week.  Not enough for an exclamation mark...but enough to barely talk about it...ha ha.

Sept 2nd:
My hubby and I went on a 5 to 6 mile hike today!  This was great.  We live in the desert and it was getting warm but we did it and I feel great!  I think if I can move tomorrow morning, I'll give another hiking trail a try!

Sept 5th:
Well, I was able to move the next day and went on another hike with a couple friends that have done that hike before.  It was a good workout and a bit more grueling of a hike than the day before because the incline was a good one.
I have a bit of good news/bad news:  Bad news = I've caught some kind of cold/flu and have been down for the count for two full days now.  Good news = I've lost several pounds due to this cold/flu thing!  I know...that's a bit morbid...but have you known me to not be morbid?

Sept 9th:
I still have this cold and it sucks!  We did go for hike #3 this morning!  Very glad I did it eventhough I wasn't feeling too well.  I felt great while hiking and now I'm back to feeling drained from this cold.  Dr apt on Thursday so I'll get antibiotics if I need them.

Sept 14th:
Went to my yearly physical with my pcp.  My BP is 112/78!  Cholesterol total is 164! Blood sugar is 100!  BMI wasnt within the range that helps me reduce my insurance costs thru work...but my Dr agreed to fudge my weight just a little bit to make that criteria as well!  I was only .6 BMI points away and so it wasnt a huge fudge...just a little one!  Also got some antibiotics so I'm feeling much much better.

Sept 15th:
Last night was our support group.  More people were there and it was a good group meeting.  They talked about relationship troubles after surgery.  The percentage of people there who have been divorced or split from their significant other was about 85%.  Listening to people tell their stories regarding divorce/splits made me realize how lucky I am.  I know how lucky I truly am, but this made me realize that I am a minority in this situation...I have a great support base starting with Gary!  So, thank you Gary for being there for me and helping me get thru this adventure. Went on a hike again yesterday with C!  Good workout!  Will go again tomorrow with Gary! 

Sept 29th:
I know, I know...it's been a while since I've posted anything on here.  The biggest reason is because I havent lost much weight since the last time.  Little frustrated with it...but it's pretty typical.  Im just worried that I won't lose the last 30 to 45 I want to lose.  ok...enough whining.  On a good note...tried on a dress yesterday...size 9/10 and I didnt bust any of the seams out!!!!  WOO HOO...YEAH ME!  I didn't buy the dress cause it didnt look that good on me...but the important thing is...it's still in tact for someone else to buy it!  Now this next comment is just an observation...I think the sizes in our society have gotten larger.  I was wearing size 9/10 in high school.  I am NO WHERE NEAR my high school weight and yet I can fit into the same size?  hmmmm.  Ok...having shared that observation, I am still thrilled that I can fit into that size!  Did a new hike today and it kicked Gary and mines butts!  It was a good hike and I tracked it on my phone and it was 3.29 miles in 1 hour and 40 minutes.  I think the one I've been doing is a little shorter than 2 miles, that one only takes us an hour.  I'll track it next time we take it.

Oct 11th:
Happy one year anniversary of my surgery to ME!  Or as we like to call it...Surgiversary!  I havent posted in a few weeks and am realizing that there truly isnt anything new to report...having said that, I think this blog has run it's course.  This has helped me express my trials and tribulations throughout this amazing process.  I so hope this blog accomplished a few things.  First and foremost...I hope someone who is trying to decide whether or not to take this road has read this and I have helped you in some way.  Second,..I hope that friends and family that read this can understand the mental, physical and emotional roller coaster this has been and I thank you all for the support and encouragement you all have given me.  I still may post a picture (before and after) when I hit goal.  Was told by the dr yesterday that I am 25 lbs away from my goal weight. It's amazing to say "25 lbs overweight"...that is music to my ears!  I'm pretty sure this will be quite a fight to get it off...but it's not like we all are working on that extra 15 to 25!  That in itself makes me feel just a little bit more normal!  Those of you that don't know me....normal isnt really a word I would use to describe me!

So I leave you with the utmost respect and thanks for joining me on this wonderful journey.

Thank you,

Jill